英語文章のメモ

501
00:26:56,240 --> 00:26:58,520
The Russian cultural attaché's
black bread

502
00:26:58,600 --> 00:27:02,840
is particularly sought after
by the more discerning duck.

503
00:27:02,920 --> 00:27:04,440
Crowley and Aziraphale
have been meeting here

504
00:27:04,520 --> 00:27:06,520
for quite some time.

505
00:27:06,600 --> 00:27:08,680
You're sure it was
the Antichrist?

506
00:27:08,760 --> 00:27:11,080
I should know.
I delivered the baby.

507
00:27:11,160 --> 00:27:13,400
Well, not "delivered" delivered,
you know?

508
00:27:14,720 --> 00:27:16,040
Handed it over.

509
00:27:16,120 --> 00:27:18,240
An American diplomat.

510
00:27:18,320 --> 00:27:19,720
Really?

511
00:27:19,800 --> 00:27:22,040
As if Armageddon
were a cinematographic show

512
00:27:22,120 --> 00:27:24,840
you wished to sell in
as many countries as possible.

513
00:27:24,920 --> 00:27:27,320
The Earth and all
the kingdoms thereof.

514
00:27:27,400 --> 00:27:30,440
We will win, of course.

515
00:27:30,520 --> 00:27:31,680
You really believe that?

516
00:27:31,760 --> 00:27:33,160
Obviously.

517
00:27:33,240 --> 00:27:36,960
Heaven will finally
triumph over Hell.

518
00:27:37,040 --> 00:27:38,680
It's all going to be
rather lovely.

519
00:27:38,760 --> 00:27:40,520
Out of interest,

520
00:27:40,600 --> 00:27:43,440
how many first-class composers
do your lot have in Heaven?

521
00:27:43,520 --> 00:27:44,880
Because Mozart's
one of ours.

522
00:27:45,560 --> 00:27:46,880
Beethoven.

523
00:27:46,960 --> 00:27:48,200
Schubert.

524
00:27:48,280 --> 00:27:49,640
Uh, all of the Bachs.

525
00:27:49,720 --> 00:27:51,760
They have already written
their music.

526
00:27:51,840 --> 00:27:55,120
And you'll never
hear it again.

527
00:27:55,200 --> 00:27:57,760
No more Albert Hall.
No more Glyndebourne.

528
00:27:57,840 --> 00:28:00,040
Just celestial harmonies.

529
00:28:00,120 --> 00:28:01,520
-Well...
-And that's just the start

530
00:28:01,600 --> 00:28:03,280
of what you'll lose
if you win.

531
00:28:03,360 --> 00:28:07,440
No more fascinating little
restaurants where they know you.

532
00:28:07,520 --> 00:28:10,080
No gravlax
in dill sauce.

533
00:28:11,120 --> 00:28:13,680
No more old bookshops.

534
00:28:17,360 --> 00:28:19,760
We've only got 11 years,
and then it's all over.

535
00:28:19,840 --> 00:28:21,560
We have to work together.

536
00:28:22,080 --> 00:28:23,560
No.

537
00:28:23,640 --> 00:28:25,440
It's the end of the world
we're talking about.

538
00:28:25,520 --> 00:28:27,320
It's not some little temptation
I've asked you to cover for me

539
00:28:27,400 --> 00:28:29,640
while you're up in Edinburgh
for the festival.

540
00:28:29,720 --> 00:28:31,000
-You can't say no.
-No.

541
00:28:31,080 --> 00:28:32,840
We can do something.
I have an idea.

542
00:28:32,920 --> 00:28:35,480
No! I am not interested.

543
00:28:36,480 --> 00:28:39,520
Well, let's have lunch, hmm?

544
00:28:39,600 --> 00:28:40,880
I still owe you one from...

545
00:28:42,800 --> 00:28:44,720
Paris.

546
00:28:45,360 --> 00:28:47,000
1793.

547
00:28:47,080 --> 00:28:50,440
Yes. The Reign of Terror.

548
00:28:50,520 --> 00:28:52,600
Was that one of ours
or one of yours?

549
00:28:52,680 --> 00:28:54,280
Can't recall.

550
00:28:55,000 --> 00:28:56,840
We had crepes.

551
00:29:04,320 --> 00:29:05,920
Mm.

552
00:29:07,800 --> 00:29:10,440
That was scrumptious.

553
00:29:10,520 --> 00:29:12,680
So, what are you
in the mood for now?

554
00:29:12,760 --> 00:29:14,000
Alcohol.

555
00:29:15,560 --> 00:29:19,160
Quite extraordinary
amounts of alcohol.

556
00:29:19,240 --> 00:29:21,000
I have several very nice bottles

557
00:29:21,080 --> 00:29:23,280
of Châteauneuf-du-Pape
in the back.

558
00:29:23,360 --> 00:29:25,480
I picked up a dozen cases
in 1921,

559
00:29:25,560 --> 00:29:28,440
and there's still some left
for special occasions.

560
00:29:30,520 --> 00:29:33,600
Not very big on wine in Heaven,
are they, though?

561
00:29:33,680 --> 00:29:36,280
Not going to get
any more nice little
Châteauneuf-du-Papes

562
00:29:36,360 --> 00:29:39,520
in Heaven,
or single malt scotch,

563
00:29:39,600 --> 00:29:42,680
or little... little froufrou
cocktails with umbrellas.

564
00:29:42,760 --> 00:29:45,640
Crowley, I've told you,
I'm not helping you.

565
00:29:45,720 --> 00:29:49,320
I'm not interested.
This is purely social.

566
00:29:49,400 --> 00:29:51,400
I am an angel.
You are a demon.

567
00:29:51,480 --> 00:29:53,920
We're hereditary enemies.

568
00:29:54,000 --> 00:29:57,600
Get thee behind me,
foul fiend.

569
00:29:57,680 --> 00:29:59,600
After you.

570
00:29:59,680 --> 00:30:01,640
That night,
Arthur and Deirdre Young

571
00:30:01,720 --> 00:30:04,280
proudly took the baby
they believed was theirs

572
00:30:04,360 --> 00:30:07,440
home to the quiet English
village of Tadfield.

573
00:30:07,520 --> 00:30:11,840
The Antichrist had been
on Earth for 24 hours.

574
00:30:14,240 --> 00:30:17,040
While in London's Soho,
an angel and a demon

575
00:30:17,120 --> 00:30:20,480
had been drinking solidly
for the last six of them.

576
00:30:24,160 --> 00:30:27,520
So, what...
what exactly is your point?

577
00:30:27,600 --> 00:30:28,800
My point is--

578
00:30:30,200 --> 00:30:33,520
My point is, dolphins.

579
00:30:33,600 --> 00:30:34,640
That's my point.

580
00:30:34,720 --> 00:30:36,960
Big brains, the size of...

581
00:30:38,080 --> 00:30:39,560
damn big brains.

582
00:30:39,640 --> 00:30:43,440
Not to mention the whales.
Brain city, whales.

583
00:30:43,520 --> 00:30:44,560
Kraken.

584
00:30:44,640 --> 00:30:49,000
Ooh, great, big bugger.

585
00:30:49,080 --> 00:30:50,440
Supposed to rise up
to the surface.

586
00:30:50,520 --> 00:30:53,360
Right... right up
at the end,

587
00:30:53,440 --> 00:30:55,000
when the sea boils.

588
00:30:55,080 --> 00:30:58,000
Well, that's my point.

589
00:30:58,080 --> 00:30:59,320
Whole sea bubbling.

590
00:30:59,400 --> 00:31:00,720
The dolphins, the whales.

591
00:31:00,800 --> 00:31:03,080
Everything turning
into bouillab--

592
00:31:03,160 --> 00:31:05,360
Bouill-bouillab--

593
00:31:05,440 --> 00:31:07,320
Bouillab--

594
00:31:07,400 --> 00:31:09,160
Fish stew.
Anyway, it's not their fault.

595
00:31:09,240 --> 00:31:11,720
And that's the same
with gorillas.

596
00:31:11,800 --> 00:31:13,880
They say, like, "Whoop".
They say a lot of--

597
00:31:13,960 --> 00:31:16,520
Sky's gone red.
There's...

598
00:31:16,600 --> 00:31:18,120
stars crashing down.

599
00:31:18,200 --> 00:31:20,480
And what are they putting
in bananas these days?

600
00:31:20,560 --> 00:31:23,760
They're All creatures,
great and small.

601
00:31:23,840 --> 00:31:26,320
And you know
what's worse?

602
00:31:27,160 --> 00:31:28,680
When it's all over,

603
00:31:28,760 --> 00:31:34,200
you've got to deal
with eternity!

604
00:31:34,280 --> 00:31:35,720
Eternity?

605
00:31:35,800 --> 00:31:38,400
Yeah,
it won't be so bad at first.

606
00:31:38,480 --> 00:31:39,840
Although no Stephen Sondheim

607
00:31:39,920 --> 00:31:42,240
first nights in eternity,
I'm afraid.

608
00:31:42,320 --> 00:31:45,400
Although, I have heard rumours
that your boss

609
00:31:45,480 --> 00:31:49,040
really loves
The Sound of Music.

610
00:31:49,120 --> 00:31:51,840
You fancy spending eternity
watching that?

611
00:31:51,920 --> 00:31:53,800
You could literally
climb every mountain

612
00:31:53,880 --> 00:31:56,560
over and over and over and over
and over and over and over.

613
00:31:56,640 --> 00:31:58,400
I don't like it
any more than you do,

614
00:31:58,480 --> 00:32:03,720
but I told you, I can't diso--
not do what I'm told.

615
00:32:03,800 --> 00:32:05,640
I'm an angel. I...

616
00:32:05,720 --> 00:32:07,040
Oh, God, I--

617
00:32:07,120 --> 00:32:08,640
I can't cope with this
while I'm drunk.

618
00:32:08,720 --> 00:32:10,160
I'm going to sober up.

619
00:32:10,240 --> 00:32:11,560
Yeah, me too.

620
00:32:27,080 --> 00:32:30,200
Harriet Dowling took
baby Warlock to his new home,

621
00:32:30,280 --> 00:32:32,480
an official London residence.

622
00:32:41,480 --> 00:32:43,480
Our mission
is done, Lord Hastur.

623
00:32:43,560 --> 00:32:44,840
The baby is in place,

624
00:32:44,920 --> 00:32:47,520
and his parents
are none the wiser.

625
00:32:47,600 --> 00:32:49,480
Well, no need for the convent
any longer, then, is there?

626
00:32:49,560 --> 00:32:51,280
- I'm afraid I--
- Dissolve.

627
00:32:51,360 --> 00:32:53,520
-What?
-Your order is dissolved.

628
00:32:53,600 --> 00:32:55,600
-We're what?
-Now hang on a moment.

629
00:32:55,680 --> 00:32:57,320
We did everything
that was asked of us.

630
00:32:57,400 --> 00:32:58,560
What about our reward?

631
00:32:58,640 --> 00:32:59,760
So irritating.

632
00:32:59,840 --> 00:33:01,280
You never shut up, do you?

633
00:33:01,360 --> 00:33:02,640
We are a chattering order.

634
00:33:02,720 --> 00:33:04,000
We say what is on
our minds.

635
00:33:04,080 --> 00:33:05,320
And right now,
what's on my mind

636
00:33:05,400 --> 00:33:06,920
is that you can't
treat us like--

637
00:33:08,320 --> 00:33:09,560
Would you like to tell them

638
00:33:09,640 --> 00:33:11,200
that the order
is dissolved?

639
00:33:11,280 --> 00:33:13,840
Or would you rather that
they all perish in the fire?

640
00:33:13,920 --> 00:33:16,040
What fire?

641
00:33:35,080 --> 00:33:36,920
Even if I wanted to help,
I couldn't.

642
00:33:37,000 --> 00:33:40,160
I can't interfere
with the Divine Plan.

643
00:33:40,240 --> 00:33:43,080
Well, what about
diabolical plans?

644
00:33:43,160 --> 00:33:44,680
You can't be certain
that thwarting me

645
00:33:44,760 --> 00:33:47,360
isn't part
of the Divine Plan, too.

646
00:33:47,440 --> 00:33:50,200
I mean, you're supposed
to thwart the wiles

647
00:33:50,280 --> 00:33:52,360
of the Evil One
at every turn, aren't you?

648
00:33:52,440 --> 00:33:53,880
Well...

649
00:33:53,960 --> 00:33:57,080
See a wile, ya' thwart.
Am I right?

650
00:33:57,160 --> 00:33:59,960
I... Broadly.

651
00:34:00,040 --> 00:34:02,200
Actually, I encourage humans
to do the actual--

652
00:34:02,280 --> 00:34:04,560
But the Antichrist
has been born.

653
00:34:04,640 --> 00:34:07,840
But it's the upbringing
that's important,
the influences.

654
00:34:07,920 --> 00:34:09,960
The evil influences,

655
00:34:10,040 --> 00:34:13,120
that's all
going to be me.

656
00:34:13,160 --> 00:34:16,920
It'd be too bad if someone
made sure that I failed.

657
00:34:22,920 --> 00:34:26,000
If you put it that way...

658
00:34:26,080 --> 00:34:29,840
Heaven couldn't actually object
if I was thwarting you.

659
00:34:29,920 --> 00:34:32,880
No. Be a real feather
in your wing.

660
00:34:42,600 --> 00:34:45,280
We'd be godfathers,
sort of,

661
00:34:45,360 --> 00:34:48,520
overseeing
his upbringing.

662
00:34:48,600 --> 00:34:49,880
We do it right,
he won't be evil.

663
00:34:49,960 --> 00:34:52,880
Or good.
He'll just be normal.

664
00:34:52,960 --> 00:34:54,760
It might work.

665
00:34:55,840 --> 00:34:58,640
Godfathers.

666
00:34:58,760 --> 00:35:00,680
Well, I'll be damned.

667
00:35:00,800 --> 00:35:03,680
It's not that bad
when you get used to it.

668
00:35:14,800 --> 00:35:17,360
I understand you need a nanny.

669
00:35:20,160 --> 00:35:23,880
They do say as you might
be looking for a gardener.

670
00:35:29,160 --> 00:35:33,320
Oh! Young master Warlock!

671
00:35:33,400 --> 00:35:36,160
You're growing fast.

672
00:35:36,200 --> 00:35:37,920
You must be all of, um...

673
00:35:38,000 --> 00:35:40,440
Five. I'm five.

674
00:35:41,680 --> 00:35:43,200
What's that?

675
00:35:43,320 --> 00:35:45,160
Oh, that's Brother Pigeon.

676
00:35:48,160 --> 00:35:49,400
And Brother Snail.

677
00:35:50,200 --> 00:35:52,600
Oh, and Sister Slug.

678
00:35:54,520 --> 00:35:58,000
Now, you remember,
young Warlock,

679
00:35:58,080 --> 00:36:00,120
as you grow,

680
00:36:00,160 --> 00:36:03,840
to have love and reverence

681
00:36:03,920 --> 00:36:06,320
for all living things.

682
00:36:06,400 --> 00:36:08,200
Nanny says living things

683
00:36:08,320 --> 00:36:12,160
are only fit to be ground
under my heels, Brother Francis.

684
00:36:13,520 --> 00:36:15,480
Well, don't you listen to her.

685
00:36:15,560 --> 00:36:17,680
You listen to me.

686
00:36:25,480 --> 00:36:28,080
Will you sing me
a lullaby, nanny?

687
00:36:28,160 --> 00:36:29,920
Of course, dear.

688
00:37:01,680 --> 00:37:05,880
The gardener says that I must be
kind and nice to everybody.

689
00:37:07,000 --> 00:37:08,640
Even Sister Slug.

690
00:37:08,680 --> 00:37:11,360
And not ever
destroy the Earth.

691
00:37:11,440 --> 00:37:14,360
Don't listen to him.

692
00:37:14,440 --> 00:37:16,760
Listen to me.

693
00:37:16,840 --> 00:37:20,200
There are many doors
that will take you to
Heaven or to Hell.

694
00:37:20,320 --> 00:37:23,520
But when Crowley and Aziraphale
report in an official capacity

695
00:37:23,600 --> 00:37:25,560
to their respective
head offices,

696
00:37:25,640 --> 00:37:27,760
they take the main entrance.

697
00:37:35,560 --> 00:37:38,080
Tell us about the boy, Warlock.

698
00:37:38,160 --> 00:37:40,360
He's a remarkable child,
Lord Beelzebub.

699
00:37:40,440 --> 00:37:43,920
-But is he evil?
-Fantastically evil.

700
00:37:44,000 --> 00:37:45,280
Killed anyone yet?

701
00:37:46,320 --> 00:37:47,880
Uh... not yet,

702
00:37:47,960 --> 00:37:49,480
but there's more to evil
than just killing people, eh?

703
00:37:50,640 --> 00:37:52,080
I suppose.

704
00:37:52,160 --> 00:37:53,600
But it's fun.

705
00:37:53,640 --> 00:37:56,160
Have you encountered
any problems from the...

706
00:37:56,280 --> 00:37:58,160
...opposition?

707
00:37:58,280 --> 00:38:01,640
They don't suspect a thing.

708
00:38:02,440 --> 00:38:04,600
I am proud to say

709
00:38:04,640 --> 00:38:06,800
that on a very real level,

710
00:38:06,880 --> 00:38:08,280
the Antichrist child

711
00:38:08,360 --> 00:38:12,560
is now being influenced
towards the light.

712
00:38:12,640 --> 00:38:14,160
Very commendable,
Aziraphale.

713
00:38:14,200 --> 00:38:16,760
-Excellent work, as usual.
-Yes.

714
00:38:16,840 --> 00:38:19,400
But, Aziraphale,
we will be most understanding

715
00:38:19,480 --> 00:38:21,520
when you fail.

716
00:38:21,600 --> 00:38:23,920
After all, wars are to be won.

717
00:38:24,000 --> 00:38:26,160
Not avoided.

718
00:38:26,200 --> 00:38:27,920
But I won't fail.

719
00:38:28,000 --> 00:38:29,640
I mean, that would be bad.

720
00:38:29,760 --> 00:38:33,280
Aziraphale, what you're doing
is praiseworthy,

721
00:38:33,360 --> 00:38:35,960
but obviously doomed
to failure.

722
00:38:37,920 --> 00:38:41,800
Still, as the Almighty
likes to say,

723
00:38:41,880 --> 00:38:43,400
"Climb every mountain."

724
00:38:46,520 --> 00:38:48,760
"Ford every stream."

725
00:39:01,040 --> 00:39:03,560
The boy's too normal.

726
00:39:03,640 --> 00:39:05,560
Excellent.
It's working.

727
00:39:05,640 --> 00:39:08,480
The heavenly influences
are balancing out the hellish.

728
00:39:08,560 --> 00:39:09,680
A no-score draw.

729
00:39:09,800 --> 00:39:11,400
I hope you're right.

730
00:39:11,480 --> 00:39:13,120
Only six years left to go.

731
00:39:13,160 --> 00:39:14,840
-Crowley.
-Yeah?

732
00:39:14,920 --> 00:39:19,480
I mean, if he comes
into his full power,

733
00:39:19,560 --> 00:39:21,840
how do we stop him then?

734
00:39:23,360 --> 00:39:25,880
I'm sure it won't
come to that.

735
00:39:52,200 --> 00:39:54,640
- He's big.
- -He's the biggest we've got.

736
00:39:54,760 --> 00:39:57,640
Only the best for our young
master-to-be.

737
00:39:57,680 --> 00:39:59,360
Do you think he's hungry?

738
00:39:59,440 --> 00:40:02,040
Only one way to find out.

739
00:40:03,400 --> 00:40:04,560
You. Get in there.

740
00:40:04,640 --> 00:40:06,680
-Me?
-Yes, yes, you.

741
00:40:11,480 --> 00:40:12,880
Watch out for his teeth.

742
00:40:12,960 --> 00:40:14,520
Ooh.

743
00:40:17,760 --> 00:40:20,280
It's not like you didn't tell
him to look out for the teeth.

744
00:40:21,640 --> 00:40:24,520
I think he was hungry.

745
00:40:24,600 --> 00:40:26,520
Warlock, are you
listening to me, honey?

746
00:40:26,600 --> 00:40:28,640
Look what they used to think
dinosaurs looked like.

747
00:40:28,760 --> 00:40:31,120
-Whatever.
-They're old and educational.

748
00:40:31,160 --> 00:40:32,640
-It's dumb.
-It's not dumb, sweetie.

749
00:40:32,760 --> 00:40:35,400
-It's a dinosaur.
-Dumbasaur, more like.

750
00:40:35,480 --> 00:40:37,960
Can we talk about
my birthday party?

751
00:40:38,040 --> 00:40:41,400
Why can't we have my party
in an escape room?

752
00:40:41,480 --> 00:40:42,960
Honey, for the last time,

753
00:40:43,040 --> 00:40:44,120
we've already hired a...

754
00:40:44,160 --> 00:40:45,800
But, Mom...

755
00:40:45,880 --> 00:40:47,880
Well, we've
done everything we can.

756
00:40:47,960 --> 00:40:52,000
All we can do now
is wait for his birthday.

757
00:40:52,080 --> 00:40:53,680
The Hell Hound
will be the key.

758
00:40:53,800 --> 00:40:56,120
Shows up at 3:00
on Wednesday.

759
00:40:56,520 --> 00:40:58,120
Right.

760
00:40:58,160 --> 00:41:00,760
You've never actually
mentioned a Hell Hound before.

761
00:41:01,320 --> 00:41:02,560
Oh, yeah.

762
00:41:02,640 --> 00:41:04,160
Yeah, they're sending him
a Hell Hound

763
00:41:04,200 --> 00:41:07,640
to pad by his side
and guard him from all harm.

764
00:41:07,680 --> 00:41:09,840
-Oh.
-Biggest one they've got.

765
00:41:09,920 --> 00:41:11,640
Won't people remark
on the sudden appearance

766
00:41:11,680 --> 00:41:13,160
of a huge black dog?

767
00:41:13,280 --> 00:41:14,960
His parents,
for a start?

768
00:41:15,040 --> 00:41:19,280
No one will notice anything.
It's reality, angel.

769
00:41:19,360 --> 00:41:21,560
And young Warlock can do
what he likes with that,

770
00:41:21,640 --> 00:41:24,880
whether he knows it or not.

771
00:41:24,960 --> 00:41:27,400
It's the start of it all.
The boy's meant to name it.

772
00:41:27,480 --> 00:41:30,880
Um... Stalks by Night,
Throat-Ripper,
something like that.

773
00:41:30,960 --> 00:41:34,080
But if you and I
have done our job properly,

774
00:41:34,160 --> 00:41:37,440
then he'll send it away
unnamed.

775
00:41:37,520 --> 00:41:39,280
What if he does name it?

776
00:41:39,360 --> 00:41:40,960
Then you and I have lost,
he'll have all his powers,

777
00:41:41,040 --> 00:41:43,600
and Armageddon
will be days away.

778
00:41:43,640 --> 00:41:46,360
There must be some way
of stopping it.

779
00:41:47,640 --> 00:41:50,160
If there was no boy...

780
00:41:50,200 --> 00:41:51,800
then the process would stop.

781
00:41:51,880 --> 00:41:54,480
Yes, but there is a boy.
He's over there,

782
00:41:54,560 --> 00:41:57,440
writing a rude word
on a description of a dinosaur.

783
00:41:57,520 --> 00:41:58,840
Well, there is a boy now.

784
00:41:58,920 --> 00:42:01,080
That could change.

785
00:42:03,480 --> 00:42:06,000
Something could happen to him.

786
00:42:07,880 --> 00:42:09,520
I'm saying
you could kill him.

787
00:42:13,960 --> 00:42:17,800
I've never actually...
killed anything.

788
00:42:21,280 --> 00:42:23,200
I don't think I could.

789
00:42:24,480 --> 00:42:28,080
Not even to save
everything?

790
00:42:30,320 --> 00:42:31,400
One life...

791
00:42:31,480 --> 00:42:33,640
against the universe.

792
00:42:38,960 --> 00:42:41,280
Then, this Hell Hound,

793
00:42:41,360 --> 00:42:42,880
it'll show up
at his birthday party?

794
00:42:42,960 --> 00:42:44,760
-Yeah.
-Well, then we should be there.

795
00:42:44,840 --> 00:42:49,640
Maybe I can stop the dog.
In fact, I could entertain.

796
00:42:49,760 --> 00:42:51,080
No, no, no.
Please, no. No.

797
00:42:51,160 --> 00:42:52,480
I just need to get back
into practice.

798
00:42:52,560 --> 00:42:54,600
Oh, no, no.
Don't do your magic act.

799
00:42:54,640 --> 00:42:57,080
- Please. Please!
I'm actually begging you.

800
00:42:57,160 --> 00:42:59,960
- You have no idea how
demeaning that is. Please.

801
00:43:02,320 --> 00:43:03,880
-In your finger.
-No, it was in your ear.

802
00:43:03,960 --> 00:43:06,840
-It was in your pocket.
-It was close to your ear.

803
00:43:06,920 --> 00:43:08,640
Never anywhere
near my ear.

804
00:43:08,680 --> 00:43:09,760
You're no fun.

805
00:43:09,840 --> 00:43:11,160
-Fun?
-Yes.

806
00:43:11,200 --> 00:43:13,160
It's humiliating.

807
00:43:13,200 --> 00:43:14,400
You can do proper magic.

808
00:43:14,480 --> 00:43:15,840
You can make things
disappear.

809
00:43:15,920 --> 00:43:17,040
But it's not as fun.

810
00:43:17,120 --> 00:43:19,520
Make you disappear.

811
00:43:19,600 --> 00:43:21,200
Where has he got to?

812
00:43:21,320 --> 00:43:24,160
Is he in here... somewhere?

813
00:43:25,680 --> 00:43:27,800
There he is! Ha! This--

814
00:43:27,880 --> 00:43:29,280
We'll come back to that one.

815
00:43:29,360 --> 00:43:31,040
You see, it's me old top hat.

816
00:43:31,120 --> 00:43:32,640
But, wait.

817
00:43:35,000 --> 00:43:37,280
What's this?

818
00:43:38,120 --> 00:43:39,800
Could it be

819
00:43:39,880 --> 00:43:41,760
our old furry friend,

820
00:43:42,920 --> 00:43:45,680
Harry the Rabbit?

821
00:43:45,800 --> 00:43:47,360
It was in the table.

822
00:43:47,440 --> 00:43:50,320
You said there was gonna be
a celebrity magician.

823
00:43:50,400 --> 00:43:53,800
I had Penn and Teller at my
party, and I had a silent disco,

824
00:43:53,880 --> 00:43:55,760
-and I got a--
-You're rubbish.

825
00:43:55,840 --> 00:43:58,240
Excuse me, excuse me.

826
00:43:58,320 --> 00:44:01,880
He's right, you know.
You are actually rubbish.

827
00:44:01,960 --> 00:44:05,000
Five, four,

828
00:44:05,080 --> 00:44:08,760
three, two, one.

829
00:44:10,280 --> 00:44:11,560
The time is upon us.

830
00:44:11,640 --> 00:44:13,720
As soon as the boy
names the Hound,

831
00:44:13,800 --> 00:44:16,080
Armageddon will begin.

832
00:44:18,320 --> 00:44:21,640
Go. Find your master.

833
00:44:26,560 --> 00:44:28,320
He's not back yet?

834
00:44:28,400 --> 00:44:30,560
He's down in Hogback Wood,
playing with his friends.

835
00:44:30,640 --> 00:44:32,440
I've told him to be home
by teatime.

836
00:44:32,520 --> 00:44:35,040
Right, well, give me a shout
when he gets back,

837
00:44:35,120 --> 00:44:38,240
then we can
light the candles.

838
00:44:50,960 --> 00:44:55,320
That was the best
11th birthday ever.

839
00:44:55,400 --> 00:44:57,200
It was all a bit of a disaster,
I'm afraid.

840
00:44:57,280 --> 00:44:59,600
Nonsense. You gave them all
a party to remember.

841
00:44:59,680 --> 00:45:02,440
Last one any of them
will ever have, mind.

842
00:45:02,520 --> 00:45:03,840
It's late.

843
00:45:03,920 --> 00:45:05,600
Comes of putting it
up your sleeve.

844
00:45:06,840 --> 00:45:07,880
No.

845
00:45:09,000 --> 00:45:10,840
The Hell Hound.

846
00:45:10,920 --> 00:45:12,760
It's late.

847
00:45:12,840 --> 00:45:14,920
...Isle of
Skye, and your time starts--

848
00:45:17,000 --> 00:45:19,480
Hello, Crowley.
- Uh, hi. Who's this?

849
00:45:19,560 --> 00:45:21,800
Dagon, Lord of the Files,

850
00:45:21,880 --> 00:45:23,520
Master of Torments.

851
00:45:23,600 --> 00:45:25,880
Yeah, just checking in
about the Hell Hound.

852
00:45:25,960 --> 00:45:27,440
He should be with you by now.

853
00:45:27,520 --> 00:45:30,640
Why? Has something
gone wrong, Crowley?

854
00:45:30,720 --> 00:45:33,280
Wrong? No, no. Nothing's wrong.
What could be wrong?

855
00:45:33,360 --> 00:45:35,000
Oh, no, I see him now, yes.

856
00:45:35,080 --> 00:45:37,600
What a lovely,
big helly Hell Hound.

857
00:45:37,680 --> 00:45:39,960
Yes, OK,
great talking to you.

858
00:45:41,560 --> 00:45:42,760
No dog.

859
00:45:44,080 --> 00:45:45,600
No dog.

860
00:45:45,680 --> 00:45:47,880
Wrong boy.

861
00:45:50,200 --> 00:45:52,240
Wrong boy.

862
00:45:52,320 --> 00:45:55,480
The right boy was playing
in the woods with his friends.

863
00:45:55,560 --> 00:45:57,720
After all,
it was his birthday.

864
00:45:57,800 --> 00:45:59,600
Hogback Wood
was their Eden,

865
00:45:59,680 --> 00:46:02,360
where they could play
unbothered by adults.

866
00:46:02,440 --> 00:46:05,120
The children called themselves
the "Them".

867
00:46:05,200 --> 00:46:08,880
Pepper and Brian,
Wensleydale,

868
00:46:08,960 --> 00:46:12,560
and the birthday boy, their
leader, who found their den

869
00:46:12,640 --> 00:46:16,560
and invented the best games
of all... Adam.

870
00:46:26,040 --> 00:46:28,800
It's my birthday.
Of course, I'm gonna get a dog.

871
00:46:28,880 --> 00:46:30,160
You never get what you want.

872
00:46:30,240 --> 00:46:33,240
I wanted a bike,
and I asked for it.

873
00:46:33,320 --> 00:46:35,440
And I told them I wanted
a razor blade saddle,

874
00:46:35,520 --> 00:46:37,680
and 12 gears and everything.

875
00:46:37,760 --> 00:46:38,880
And do you know
what they got me?

876
00:46:38,960 --> 00:46:41,440
A girl's bike.
With a basket.

877
00:46:41,520 --> 00:46:43,720
But you are actually
a girl, Pepper.

878
00:46:43,800 --> 00:46:45,120
That's just sexist.

879
00:46:45,200 --> 00:46:47,080
I want a dog.

880
00:46:47,160 --> 00:46:48,960
Oh, right. And your mum and dad

881
00:46:49,040 --> 00:46:51,160
are just going to get you a big
old Rotten-weiler, then, Adam?

882
00:46:51,240 --> 00:46:52,200
I don't want a big dog.

883
00:46:54,080 --> 00:46:57,680
I want the kind of dog you can
have fun with. A little dog.

884
00:46:57,760 --> 00:46:59,600
I want a dog that's brilliantly
intelligent,

885
00:46:59,680 --> 00:47:02,480
and can go down rabbit holes,
and I can teach tricks.

886
00:47:02,560 --> 00:47:04,640
And I'll call him...

887
00:47:04,720 --> 00:47:07,480
And this is the moment.
The naming.

888
00:47:07,560 --> 00:47:10,760
This will give it its purpose,
its function, its identity.

889
00:47:10,840 --> 00:47:15,000
This is the moment that sets
Armageddon into motion.

890
00:47:16,360 --> 00:47:18,920
The Hell Hound growls a low,
rumbling snarl

891
00:47:19,000 --> 00:47:21,280
of spring-coiled menace.

892
00:47:21,360 --> 00:47:23,320
The sort of growl that starts
in the back of one throat

893
00:47:23,400 --> 00:47:26,040
and ends up deep
in someone else's.

894
00:47:26,120 --> 00:47:27,360
I think I'll call him "Dog".

895
00:47:31,000 --> 00:47:33,440
Saves a lot of trouble,
a name like that.

896
00:47:33,520 --> 00:47:35,080
And, what, this dog's
just gonna turn up?

897
00:47:35,160 --> 00:47:36,600
Maybe.

898
00:47:42,120 --> 00:47:43,240
Here, boy. Come on.

899
00:48:01,920 --> 00:48:03,600
Armageddon is days away,

900
00:48:03,680 --> 00:48:05,760
and we've lost the Antichrist.

901
00:48:05,840 --> 00:48:09,920
Why did the powers of Hell have
to drag me into this anyway?

902
00:48:10,000 --> 00:48:11,880
Well, don't quote me on this,
but I'm pretty sure

903
00:48:11,960 --> 00:48:13,800
it's because of all those memos
you kept sending them,

904
00:48:13,880 --> 00:48:16,160
saying how amazingly well
you were doing.

905
00:48:16,240 --> 00:48:17,840
Is it my fault
they never check-up?

906
00:48:17,920 --> 00:48:20,960
I'm to blame
they never check-up?

907
00:48:21,040 --> 00:48:23,960
Everyone stretches the truth
a bit in memos to head office.

908
00:48:24,040 --> 00:48:25,400
-You know that.
-Yes, but you told them

909
00:48:25,480 --> 00:48:27,240
you invented
the Spanish Inquisition

910
00:48:27,320 --> 00:48:29,480
and started
the Second World War.

911
00:48:29,560 --> 00:48:32,080
So the humans beat me to it.
That's not my fault.

912
00:48:34,520 --> 00:48:36,040
Something's changed.

913
00:48:36,120 --> 00:48:37,720
Oh, it's a new cologne.
My barber suggested it.

914
00:48:37,800 --> 00:48:39,960
Not you.
I know what you smell like.

915
00:48:43,520 --> 00:48:45,800
The Hell Hound
has found its master.

916
00:48:45,880 --> 00:48:47,040
Are you sure?

917
00:48:47,120 --> 00:48:49,440
I felt it.
Would I lie to you?

918
00:48:49,520 --> 00:48:51,320
Well, obviously. You're a demon.
That's what you do.

919
00:48:51,400 --> 00:48:54,000
No, I'm not lying.
The boy, wherever he is,

920
00:48:54,080 --> 00:48:56,320
has the dog.

921
00:48:56,400 --> 00:48:58,240
He's named it.
It's done.

922
00:48:58,320 --> 00:49:00,160
He's coming into his power.

923
00:49:01,320 --> 00:49:02,760
We're doomed.

924
00:49:03,760 --> 00:49:04,960
Well, then...

925
00:49:06,600 --> 00:49:08,320
welcome to the end times.